Sean “X-Pac” Waltman was a part of the two biggest Attitude Era stables: the nWo and D-Generation X. In the years that followed, Waltman had struggles with substance abuse. During an appearance on Mark Calaway’s “Six Feet Under” podcast, Waltman opened up about the lowest points in that battle.
“It culminated in me being in Mexico. After I left [WWE], I ended up in Mexico and worked for AAA for four years,” he recalled. “I ended up in a big fight with my girlfriend. We lived in a penthouse apartment and there was a rooftop garden. I went onto the rooftop garden and I found a garden hose, and I hung myself from the roof of the building.”
Waltman began tearing up while recalling the story, thanking his ex-girlfriend for saving his life and adding that he was put into an induced coma because of the loss of oxygen, as doctors believed he was braindead. “I was in a coma for three days. I come up out of it, and I’m strapped to a table, and I’m freaking [out]. I’m like, ‘What the hell’s going on here?'” he further recalled. He was then told what happened, which jogged his memory, and he was later met in Mexico by Kevin Nash, who flew him up to Houston, Texas, where he was booked into a place called the Menninger Clinic.
‘I’m afraid to think about whoever went into that room after me; what they found in that room then’
Recovery wasn’t easy for Waltman, and during his time at the Menninger Clinic, he recalls that he was in terrible shape. “My eyes were solid red, I looked like the Devil, because all the blood vessels were popping,” he recalled, noting that he had to wear sunglasses because nobody wanted to look him in the eye.
According to the Waltman, the Menninger Clinic only offers three-month stays, and while he got a lot of out his time there, he practically begged them to keep him there longer. They could not, and he had to return to Mexico to the very apartment he tried to take his life in.
“My girl, she had left by the way, and so I was there, alone, in this apartment that I hung myself off the roof of,” he recalled, adding that this led to him spiraling out once again. “I was, like, a big meth head, too, by the way. And so it’s one of the worst things you can do.” Waltman noted that while he started using drugs again, he got a call to work with TNA, which resulted in him leaving everything behind in Mexico and never going back. “I’m afraid to think about whoever went into that room after me; what they found in that room then.”
‘My eyes were solid red, I looked like the Devil’
The WWE Hall of Famer noted that the episode he was referring to happened about twenty years ago. He then moved back to Los Angeles, where television host Maria Menounos and her husband took him in and helped him get his life back on track.
Waltman also said he’d been punishing himself for the pain he caused his wife and children when he left them, and further admitted that he felt a lot of shame and believed he deserved to be in hell. However, treatment helped him break free. “I finally felt like I had paid in full,” he added. Waltman noted that he even stopped drinking, but that he uses cannabis today to deal with his pain, though claims his relationship with it isn’t the same as with the drugs he once used.
“I feel like this is the best version of myself that’s ever been on this Earth,” Waltman professed after sharing his story. “And the big reward for all this, besides getting my relationship back with my kids, and having a grandson — my four-year-old grandson — my marriage! I have the happiest marriage!”
If you or anyone you know is having suicidal thoughts, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline by dialing 988 or by calling 1-800-273-TALK (8255).
If you or anyone you know needs help with addiction issues, help is available. Visit the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website or contact SAMHSA’s National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357).
If you use any quotes from this article, please credit “Six Feet under with The Undertaker,” and provide a h/t to Wrestling Inc. for the transcription.
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